Brenda Reid 10/4/25 Brenda Reid 10/4/25

The Power of Forgiveness: breaking the chains that hold us hostage

“But I don’t want to!”

I’ll admit, that was my own response to the Lord when someone offended me. I wasn’t ready to forgive. I had all kinds of reasons to delay forgiveness. I wanted to hold onto the offense, coddle it, and hold it close because I was justified to do so (and others would agree, of course!) There was security and power in holding a grudge. That person wronged me, hurt me, did or said things that were not right. If I forgave them, I would be letting them ‘off the hook’ and that would be wrong…right?

We struggle to do what Jesus asks us because we think that if we forgive, we’re exonerating that person from their offense and we’re removing their accountability for what they’ve done. “Lord, if I forgive them, then they’re getting away with it!” Satan deceives us into that mindset, friends along with the delusion that we have that kind of power. Ultimately, God holds that ‘other’ accountable- He sees and knows. They will stand before Him and answer for what they’ve done. No one gets away with sin. No one. Sometimes the law or the church can successfully bring justice or resolution, but be assured, the offense will not be forgotten, nor will it be dismissed in the eyes of God.

But when it comes to our sons and daughters, our protective parental nature steps up to shield our kids and make sure they’re okay. We will fight for them when they cannot stand for themselves. And we’re even more cautious and hesitant to offer forgiveness because we’re protecting our family and we want justice and to see payment for the offense.

“Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Matthew 18:21

When Peter asked Jesus, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” (Matthew 18:21). I’m sure Peter thought he was being generous and righteous, taking the higher road, to forgive someone seven times was going above and beyond, right?

But Jesus' response turned that around. “Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” (Matthew 18:22)

Why would Jesus say that?

You see, forgiveness is not just for the ‘other’ person. Forgiveness is for us who are offended and who struggle with the injustice of it. Forgiving once isn’t enough because those feelings of injustice, hurt, pain, anger, bitterness and more come flooding back into our hearts in ever increasing waves and begin to put distance between us and God. Oh, we justify it by saying we’re holding that other person accountable. But really, we’re poisoning our own hearts in our quest to justify our hurt and bring accountability to the other. Holding that other person accountable becomes our full time obsession and consumes our thinking, our being and steals our joy.

Studies show that harboring unforgiveness has a physical impact on our bodies.

“Chronic anger puts you into a fight-or-flight mode, which results in numerous changes in heart rate, blood pressure and immune response. Those changes, then, increase the risk of depression, heart disease and diabetes, among other conditions. Forgiveness, however, calms stress levels, leading to improved health.” (1)

Unforgiveness can damage us for life and lead to a premature death. It can be all consuming and ruinous. Why would we allow something to have that much power over us?

The act of forgiveness releases that pain, hurt, and poison. But it’s never a ‘one and done’ act. We need to forgive as many times as it takes for our head and heart to recognize and believe that we can trust GOD to hold that other person accountable and to be confident He will bring justice- it’s not for us to ensure. Oh, if laws were broken and restitution is needed, of course it’s important to engage the legal system. But friends, it’s even more important to engage our hearts with the Lord and surrender to His Lordship. Why would we let someone else’s offense damage our relationship with God? Then their offense becomes doubly-damaging.

It is not our responsibility to be the prosecuting attorney in the courtroom of the Lord. That’s just not our job. Essentially, when we do that, we are putting ourselves in God’s place and friends, that’s idolatry. When we refuse to forgive, we are telling God we don’t trust Him to bring justice and resolution. We question His authority, His power, and His lordship in our lives when we cling to unforgiveness. When we hold onto an offense, it becomes the ‘third wheel’ in the relationship and soon, it becomes the focus and God takes a back seat.

Instead, every time we feel that anger, bitterness, and pain bubble up, we need to say “I forgive them.” Say it out loud, say it in your heart, say it to the Lord, and pray that He would help you feel that forgiveness. We need to continue saying it until we truly feel the forgiveness that releases us from the bondage of bitterness that would damage our communion with the Lord. We need to say it until we are no longer consumed by it.

Jesus told Peter to forgive seventy times seven because He knew how an offense and the resulting bitterness linger and unless we’re willing to give it to the Lord and allow Him to be our avenger, we will become hardened, bitter, and a victim of that offense all over again, and again, and again.

“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” Mark 11:25

Jesus also told Peter, “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” (Mark 11:25). Think about that! Do we want Jesus to forgive us? If so, then we need to forgive others.

Do you ever feel like your prayers are hitting the ceiling but not reaching the Lord? Could it be you need to do some forgiving?

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37

Now here’s an important parenting moment….of course our sons and daughters have encountered hurt and offense…how do we advise them? And do we carry a grudge on their behalf?

Oh, friends, when someone wrongs our kids, the “Momma bear” can come out and take over, right? But if we want to be an example of Christ to our sons and daughters, we need to model Jesus to them. Jesus forgave those who crucified Him. Think about that. Jesus forgave those who put Him to death. He knew that He held the ultimate power and that one day those same people would stand before Him…His love for them and His desire to see them know and follow Him as Lord and Savior eclipsed everything else. Would Jesus deny them salvation? No! That was the very reason He was willing to die. And friends, that same Savior who holds ultimate power is the One who lives in us. That same power that raised Him from the dead is the same power that works in us (Ephesians 1:18-20). The same Lord who conquered sin and death is the Lord who is in control of every aspect of our life. Why would we set that aside for the sake of holding onto the sinful attitude of unforgiveness?

Do we have a heart for others that, more than earthly justice and payback to others, wants to see lost people saved? Do we want to see lives changed and surrendered to the Lord or are we clinging to our need for personal justice and accountability at the cost of eternity?

True freedom comes by praying for those who have hurt you. Pray for their heart- that they would find forgiveness and purpose with life in Christ. And pray that Jesus would heal your heart and help you forgive. There is so much freedom in forgiveness. There is joy, there is purpose, and there is a pathway to serving the Lord free from the chains of bitterness and unforgiveness. Satan uses unforgiveness to hold us hostage, but freedom is found in Christ and in the forgiveness He empowers us to embrace.

“Forgive. Seventy times seven and keep forgiving until God grants you the freedom from the bondage of unforgiveness.”

The best thing we can do is to pray.

“Oh, Lord, it’s so hard to surrender control over the situations and people who have hurt me. I know I don’t have the ability to bring justice, to make them pay for their offenses, and to restore what was lost. Yet I’m afraid to let go and forgive because it seems counter-productive and in my mind and heart. In my human mind, forgiveness releases them from being accountable. But Lord, I know You see it and You will take it in hand. Psalm 10:14 reminds me, “But you, God, see the trouble of the afflicted; you consider their grief and take it in hand. The victims commit themselves to you; you are the helper of the fatherless.” I am not Fatherless, Lord, because I have You. I pray that You would see my trouble. See the trouble of (name), my (son/daughter). I ask that You would bring healing and freedom from the pain of the wrong done and from the bitterness and anger that fester. Give us courage and strength to forgive, not just for the other person, but to maintain our relationship with You. Please help us to not allow this to stand in the way of our fellowship with You. So right now, I choose to forgive (name) for what they did and the pain they caused. I forgive them Lord and pray that You would work in their life, bring confession, repentance, and redemption so that (name) would come to know You as Lord and Savior. Help (name) to recognize that hurting others only tightens the chains of bondage that Satan holds over them and to understand that there is boundless spiritual freedom in following Jesus as Lord and. Bring healing and freedom to all of us, Lord. I pray this in Jesus’ name, amen.”

Pray without ceasing.

Forgiveness: Your health depends on it. Johns Hopkins Medicine. (2024, June 20). https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/forgiveness-your-health-depends-on-it

Are you praying for a prodigal? Don’t lose heart. God sees and He hears. Keep laying your burdens in prayer at the feet of Jesus. Trust Him, He is working. You may not see it, but He works in dimensions that are beyond our comprehension. Pray for those friends and associates that interact with your beloved prodigal, that God would use them to bring them to full surrender to Jesus as Lord.

40 Days of Prayer for the Prodigal is a powerful book for anyone deeply in prayer for the heart of their loved one. The book addresses the battle for the heart, mind, and soul of the prodigal through praying Scripture boldly and consistently with faith that God will bring repentance and restoration. Pray the words of Scripture in powerful and effective ways to plead with God about the condition and situation of your beloved prodigal and watch God work!

Grab your copy today!

Available on Amazon

Have you read 40 Days of Prayer for the Prodigal? Consider leaving a review! There are so many who could benefit from this resource, let them know! God is moving and working!

Brenda Reid 9/23/25 Brenda Reid 9/23/25

Don’t Ever Stop Praying

Are you feeling weary? Does it seem like you keep praying, day in and day out, asking for change in your son or daughter’s heart, yet, each day goes by all the same? Don’t give up! God is working and it may be there is a wrestling going on in the heart of your son or daughter that you cannot see. Pray that the Holy Spirit would continue to bring conviction and surrender. Pray they would grow weary of the wrestling and surrender to God.

Remember trying to change your toddler’s diaper? At times it was like wrestling an alligator. The rolling and twisting was top rate. It was a battle of strength and agility, parental will pitted against toddler will with grunts, cries, and frustration on all sides. Anyone watching got to see a full-on wrestling match, all in an effort to just change a diaper. The toddler wanted their freedom, they had things to do, messes to make, and naps to avoid. But the parent, the parent just wanted to clean them up and get them out of the mess they were sitting in. They wanted the best for their little one.

God wants the best for us, too. He is willing to step into the wrestling to get us out of the filth we’re sitting in. Maybe that’s just what’s going on in the heart of your son or daughter, a wrestling between their will and God’s. They wrestle and resist, wanting their own way, telling Him He’s unkind, unreasonable, and too demanding of them. He’s restricting their movement, harshing their fun. They don’t see their mess…or if they do, they’re satisfied with it and just want to be left alone. But, yet, they’re wrestling…and that means they’re engaging with God on some level. Don’t stop praying!

Oh, how we want our sons and daughters to be surrendered to God so that He can do His work in their lives, don’t we? Yet, they wrestle. They resist. And if we’re honest, we do the same. We don’t want to be told what to do and heaven forbid God points out sin that needs to be addressed. No one wants to hear that. Yet, we have a loving Father who just wants to clean us up from the mess we’re sitting in. He wants to give us a healthy spiritual life that is reflected in a godly testimony to others. He wants us to live like Jesus.

“We know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands. Whoever says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person. But if anyone obeys his word, love for God is truly made complete in them. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did.” 1 John 2:3-6

Jesus didn’t wrestle with the Father, He submitted to Him. Even when the Father asked our Lord to surrender His life to pay for our sins, Jesus did it willingly. So when we wrestle with God, we’re not living as Jesus did. We’re fighting God, kicking against His will and defying the Holy Spirit.

Keep on praying. God is working and though we may only see the battle, He sees the heart. He hears our cries..and theirs. He is responding and working in ways we can’t fully understand. He will not let them go, He’ll see it through because they need to be changed. God refuses to let them sit in their filth forever.

Let’s pray Scripture over them today:

Luke 5:12 “While he was in one of the cities, there came a man full of leprosy. And when he saw Jesus, he fell on his face and begged him, “Lord, if you will, you can make me clean.” Lord, I know you can make [name] clean. I pray You would give them the desire to be cleansed and healed from sin. Draw them to Your side, urge them to ask You for healing and deliverance. Help them to stop wrestling and look to You for rescue, redemption, and restoration. I pray that [name] would pray Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”

“Restore to [name] the joy of Your salvation and renew a right spirit in [name].” Ps 51:12 May Psalm 51:17 be the prayer of their heart, “My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.”

Oh what joy that would bring to my heart, and I know it would fill You with joy as well, Lord, to see [name] surrender to You and be in a right relationship with You.

Lord, conquer the wrestling spirit in [name] and give them the peace and joy that only comes from You. I pray, Father, that they would see You have their best in mind, You want to bless them with joy, hope, and peace. Clean them up, Lord. Give them a heart like Jesus. In His name I pray, amen.”

Pray without ceasing.

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Brenda Reid 12/16/24 Brenda Reid 12/16/24

Presents or Presence?

In this season of giving gifts and celebrating Christ’s birth with family and friends, we look forward to time spent together. If given the chance, most parents would likely say they would prefer seeing their children on the holidays versus receiving a gift from them. The gift is thoughtful, but having our son home for a visit, or eating together with our daughter, sharing conversation with our children and enjoying one another’s company means so much more. The relationship takes precedence over the gift. A gift can be thoughtful, but it doesn’t embody the person. It doesn’t talk to us or give the warmth of affection, personality, or life. It’s a gesture, not a relationship.

Much like an absentee parent might ply their child with expensive gifts to try and make up for their absence, too often we try to do the same with God with our acts of service, our ‘checklist of righteousness’, our talents and offerings. Yet we sometimes withhold the very thing He wants most- our heart.

The child is not fooled, and neither is God.

God doesn’t crave substitutions. He doesn’t desire our sacrifices for Him in lieu of our being with Him. He wants our presence, not our presents. He owns the cattle on a thousand hills. All the riches of Creation are His. He lacks nothing and there is nothing out of His reach, beyond His ability or budget. The one thing He wants is our hearts. And that, friends, is the one thing we can withhold from Him, if we choose not to surrender. Oh, our heart’s cry should be that our sons and daughters surrender to the Lord with their whole heart- no compromise, no negotiation, no cheap substitutions, but an authentic relationship with God Most High.

God longs for us to abide in Him, to spend time in prayer, to commune with Him, rest in His Presence and find shelter, peace, and assurance in Him. When we opt to ‘do’ and ‘give’ and think that God should be impressed and delighted, we miss the point. Our gifts do not take the place of the relationship with Him. Nor do they make up for our shortcomings, failures, willful defiance, or conscious sin. God wants our being more than our doing. Doing without being found in Him is empty and really, it’s false religion.

King Saul did that very thing. He opted to do as He wished and give gifts to God to make up for His rebellion. But God saw through his ruse. God didn’t accept the gifts. And Saul’s willful defiance and attempt at ‘doing’ sacrifice versus ‘being’ obedient brought his downfall and his death.

1 Samuel 15:22-23 “Samuel said, “Does the LORD have as much delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices As in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than a sacrifice, And to pay attention is better than the fat of rams. For rebellion is as reprehensible as the sin of divination, And insubordination is as reprehensible as false religion and idolatry. Since you have rejected the word of the LORD, He has also rejected you from being king.”

What do we want most from our children this Christmas? We want them to follow Jesus- willingly and passionately. We don’t want them going through the motions, acting the part. We don’t want dramatic sacrifices that make big impressions on others. We don’t want lavish displays of talent ‘all for the glory’. We long to see authentic faith being lived out every day. We want to see our sons and daughters crave time with Jesus. We want to see fruit that gives evidence of a heart surrendered to Him. We want to see them living in the Presence of the Almighty God and Savior and, in turn, living a life that is a gift to Him, all day every day. Fully surrendered and loving Him intentionally and authentically. A present is short-lived. It often doesn’t fit, or we already have it. Soon after the holidays it may find itself on a pile to donate or put in a drawer or closet, to be forgotten until another time. But Presence doesn’t wear out. Presence brings a warmth and memory that endure. Presence is investment in the life of another by way of time spent, words spoken, arms extended and hearts knit together. This season, let’s pray that our sons and daughters practice presence with God, intentionally, authentically, and regularly- not just for this season, but for every day of their life.

“Holy Father, You make it clear your expectations of us. Yet too often we try and negotiate the terms. We try to do things our way, substitute gifts for obedience, acts of service for submission, and sacrifice in lieu of surrender to You. Lord, I know you see (name)’s heart. You see through the facade that we all put up and You see to the heart- the true condition of what lies there, our loyalties and our cravings, our willful sins and those that are hidden. Lord, I pray that You would speak clearly to (name) today. Holy Spirit, call them into fellowship with You. Open their eyes to recognize the emptiness of things and actions without Jesus. Help them crave time with You. Let their ‘being’ in Christ motivate their ‘doing’ that gives evidence of fruit- love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. A selfish heart can’t produce those, only a heart that is truly surrendered to You. Lord, have your way with (name). May they give You their whole heart, every day, without reservation, so that You, in turn, can give them abundant life. Lord, I pray that You would give me the gift of seeing (name) follow after You authentically and intentionally from this point onward. Lord, do a work in (name)’s heart and life. May You be pleased with them and may it be for Your honor and glory, in Jesus’ name, amen.

On a personal note…

Thank you for following along in 2024. It’s been a joy to have you all read and pray- I know God is working in our sons and daughters, and He’s working in our hearts, too!

I will be taking a brief break to spend time with my own sons and daughters for the next couple of weeks. But don’t worry, Join the PAC Prayer will be back in 2025 with more devotionals and prayers….and a NEW BOOK releasing on Amazon soon!! - Stay tuned for updates on the new title: 40 Days of Prayer for the Prodigal.

“For from him and through him and for him are all things. To him be the glory forever! Amen.” Romans 11:36

I pray you have a blessed celebration of Christ’s birth and a wonderful new year. Look ahead and be excited about what God is doing! He is moving and working and I’m confident He will show us great things in the year to come!

Pray without ceasing!

Brenda Reid 11/28/21 Brenda Reid 11/28/21

I Surrender All

Ah, Sunday. A day of focused worship. A day of rest. Today, spend some time in praise and worship of our Lord. Be refreshed in His Word. Sing to Him. Let your worship be a fragrant offering to the Lord.

All to Jesus I surrender,
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In His presence daily live.

Refrain:
I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to Thee, my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Humbly at His feet I bow;
Worldly pleasures all forsaken,
Take me, Jesus, take me now.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Make me, Savior, wholly Thine;
Let me feel the Holy Spirit,
Truly know that Thou art mine.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Lord, I give myself to Thee;
Fill me with Thy love and power,
Let Thy blessing fall on me.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Now I feel the sacred flame;
Oh, the joy of full salvation!
Glory, glory, to His Name!

Judson W. Van DeVenter, 1896