God Sees It All
“Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.” Hebrews 4:13
The other day I had the joy of going to a wedding shower. It was about an hour away, so I was on the highway, listening to some praise music, enjoying the drive and watching the GPS because I would have to soon exit onto another highway. Suddenly a large SUV came flying by my left side and nearly cut me off. He pulled into my lane, nearly hitting me, then proceeded to weave in and out of traffic across four lanes and was speeding close to 100 mph (161 kph) (the speed limit was 70mph). It startled me at first, it was so reckless. Then I was concerned and a bit annoyed. I literally prayed out loud, “Lord, let the police see that person and pull them over before they cause an accident!”. The words were hardly out of my mouth when another vehicle passed me quickly on the left … It was a state trooper. I laughed out loud, God heard my prayer and answered within moments! That trooper was driving fast, trying to catch up to the one who was driving even faster and recklessly. There were no lights. No sirens. Just an intentional focus and purposeful driving to catch the one who was breaking the law. He wasn’t making a ‘big deal’ of his pursuit so that others were aware. But he saw, he knew, and he was taking action. His goal wasn’t to catch and punish but to stop the behavior that was putting people at risk. Yes, there would be consequences, but the goal was safety and rescue.
I had to take my exit and continue on a different highway and didn’t see the outcome, but I’m pretty certain that the individual who was speeding found himself getting a hefty ticket and a stern talking to about his driving. He had to give account for his choices that were seen and called out by the police. God struck me with the spiritual significance of what I just witnessed. That police officer was like the Holy Spirit going after someone who is running from the Lord. He saw the individual’s choice to sin. He went after them to bring them to account, but also to keep them safe from the danger they were pursuing. He did it quietly and with intention. He had the authority to do so. And hopefully, there was a lesson learned in the process. Yet, few people around really noticed the officer working. He didn’t announce it for all to see. He stayed focused on the one who needed his intervention, even though that individual did not want the attention.
Sometimes our sons and daughters are going their own way, they’re running from the Lord, choosing to sin, indifferent to those around them, or just too focused on their own desires to see how their choices are putting their spiritual safety at risk. They don’t see the heartache they’re causing. But the Holy Spirit is there, He sees, and He’s following them, intent on reaching them to stop them from their destructive ways. He doesn’t come with ‘lights and sirens’; He often comes unexpectedly. But, He sees. He knows. And He is following them. We may not see Him working, but we need to trust that He is. We may be frustrated, “Lord, why don’t you act?!” But He is moving with purpose and intention to accomplish His will in that individual’s life.
The Holy Spirit is working, even when we cannot see it. We may get frustrated, “Lord, why don’t you act?” When, in fact, He is working. But our limited vision doesn’t see His hand. This is what faith is about…trusting in the unseen and resting in the omnipotent power of the Lord of lords. We don’t have the power and authority to intervene just as I didn’t have the power or authority to pull over that speeding driver. I had to trust that law enforcement would do their job. The officer was watching even when I didn’t see him working- it was comforting and a sobering reminder.
God is eternal. We know that, but sometimes we lose sight of what that means. He knows everything. He sees the direction we will go before we even take a step. He’s watching our choices, our thoughts, and our intentions. When we are caught in our sin, we’re often oblivious to the Holy Spirit until He’s right there, upon us, revealing our sin and stirring our conscience, and leading us to repentance. God sees your beloved son or daughter. He knows where they are and what they’re doing. Psalm 139:2-4 tells us,
“You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, you, LORD, know it completely.”
There is nothing that escapes God’s attention. He is not slow to act. He is not insufficient in His responses. The difficult part for us is waiting and trusting. We want to see a resolution now. We want assurance that our sons and daughters will walk with the Lord. We want relief from the worry and pain. But we need to trust Him that He will intervene and He will work in His time and according to His will.
We need to choose to parent with purpose and intention. When our sons and daughters are going their own way, will we allow that to send us into a frenzy of worry and grief or will we move forward with quiet trust in the Lord? Will we carry our burdens of pain, sorrow, and worry or will we lay them on the altar for God to manage?
When we pray, we are stepping into the supernatural realm with the power of God in us. We are communing with the Great I Am, the King of Kings and Lord of lords, the God of gods. We have access to the Throne room of the One to whom every knee will bow and every tongue confess His Lordship. Why would we allow ourselves to wring our hands and worry our hearts? We have the power of the Almighty on our side.
Whether your son or daughter is walking with the Lord or not, they need prayer. Time is short and Satan knows it. This generation is his target - if he can capture their heart, and their mind, he will be one step closer to his goal of destroying mankind- the image bearers of the Most High God.
Let’s pray with purpose. Let’s pray with intention. Let’s pray a portion of Hannah’s prayer in 1 Samuel 2:1-3 and 10:
Holy Father, Lord of lords, I want to pray like Hannah who said, “My heart rejoices in the Lord; in the Lord my horn is lifted high.” Oh, Lord, You are the One who exalts and who brings down. I pray today that You would work in (name)’s heart today. Get their attention, bring them to repentance. Hannah also said, “My mouth boasts over my enemies, for I delight in your deliverance.” You are the only One who can bring deliverance. Why would I trust in any other? Lord, take my worry, take my grief, soften my heart to be surrendered to Your will and Your timeline. Hannah understood Your authority and praised you saying, “There is no one holy like the Lord; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” Help me to praise you, too, and to rest in Your power and authority. Keep me from speaking words that do not honor You or voicing my frustration that things are not yet resolved. “Do not keep talking so proudly or let your mouth speak such arrogance, for the Lord is a God who knows, and by him deeds are weighed.” I pray that (name) would understand that You know and You will weigh their choices, their thoughts, their desires. Give them a heart that longs after You. I know that You see. I know that You are acting, even if I cannot see it yet. I trust You Lord, help me to rest in that trust. You are my hope and salvation. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.”
Do you know Jesus as your Lord and Savior? If not, who are you trusting in for your eternal salvation? The Bible says, “Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.” Acts 4:2
It’s not about being “good” or doing good works to achieve righteousness because nothing we can do would ever be enough to justify ourselves before a righteous God. “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away.” Isaiah 64:6
But God loves us so much that He made a way. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in Him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.” John 3:16-18
So, how do we believe? How do we receive so great a salvation that when God looks on us, He sees Jesus, perfect, holy, and righteous? Romans 10:9-11 says, “If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. As scripture says, “Anyone who believes in Him will never be put to shame.” Romans 10:9-11
“God's kindness is intended to lead you to repentance.” Romans 2:4 Will you embrace God’s kindness today? Will you declare with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead? Any other religion asks you to give your all for their god, but Jesus gave His all for us so that we could be reconciled to Him.
If you want to surrender your life to Christ today, pray this prayer, “Lord Jesus, I know that I am a sinner. I am lost and separated from You because of my sin- my wrong thoughts, actions, and desires- I confess that. But I believe You died for me, You paid for my sin so that I could stand before You forgiven, justified, and redeemed. I ask that You would be my Lord and Savior. Forgive me. Cleanse me. Make me Your child. I believe that God the Father raised You, Jesus, from the dead so that death and hell have no power over me. I know that one day I will stand in heaven with You as Your child, redeemed, loved, and chosen. Thank you for new life, for Jesus, and for Your mighty forgiveness. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
If you prayed that prayer, would you let me know so I can be praying for you? You now have so many brothers and sisters in Christ who intercede for you and your spiritual growth and protection! Welcome to the Family of God!
If you’re praying for a prodigal, consider this powerful resource, 40 Days of Prayer for the Prodigal. This book walks the reader through 40 days of intentional prayer for the heart of the one who is running from God. It includes a focus on God and His attributes, then an honest explanation of the sin and sorrow that pulls the prodigal away from God. Prayer is scripture-based and journal prompts allow the reader to thoughtfully record what they are praying and learning throughout the 40 day journey. Order your copy on Amazon today!
The Importance of Accountability
We’ve all heard the stories of Christian leaders whose lives impacted many and whose words were followed with conviction and enthusiasm. We’ve followed some of them, only later to learn that the individual was entertaining sin, deep, grievous sin that disqualified them from ministry. Sin that was always at the expense of others who trusted them. Sin that was dark, nasty, and contradictory to their message and their persona. And one of the biggest factors involved was accountability…or the lack thereof. A big red flag for someone’s character (or lack thereof) is a resistance to accountability and push back towards those who ask it of them.
No one is so great that they cannot be held accountable. No one has such a powerful ministry that another believer cannot question their actions, words, and choices in an honest and Biblical way. If that happens and the individual is not willing to be transparent, that’s a huge red flag.
But it doesn’t just apply to leaders. We are ALL to be accountable for our lives because it is what keeps us following Christ authentically and helps us avoid the traps of sin and temptation. There is no one who does not need accountability. We are all sinners, saved by grace. And we all struggle with that fleshly temptation to revert back to what we once were. The challenge and the deception is that we think we can control it. Yet, it ends up controlling us. Accountability deters that.
Effective accountability requires several things: humility, community, transparency, and honesty. If someone is resistant to any of those, that is a red flag.
Humility
We are to follow the example of Christ, who humbled himself to whatever the Father willed. It is a willingness to allow your life to be open to others.
“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.” Philippians 2:3-7
We spent a lot of time building up our kids, encouraging them, cultivating leadership and character, but did we emphasize humility? It’s a quality that is valued and needed. It reflects Christ, and it positions the individual to look at themselves, their actions, choices, and words with honesty. Pray for humility.
Accountability requires community. Someone who operates alone answers to a committee of one. Whatever they choose to do is self-approved, self-supported, and self-celebrated. When someone pushes others away, or intimidates those around them into silence, that is not only abuse of position and power, it is arrogance and self-importance. It is a blatant sin. Godly community helps us remain aligned with right practices and respect for God and his expectations for us.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
We didn’t isolate our children as we raised them. We ensured they had good friends, other families who lived and believed as we did to influence them, because we understood the value of the ‘village’. But as children grow into adulthood, they do not always retain the values and practices with which they were raised or see the importance of holding protections in place. .Pray for Godly community that would speak into their lives and influence them with Christ-likeness.
Accountability requires transparency. Paul and Titus wanted to ensure their ministry was God-honoring and gave evidence of that to everyone they encountered. They understood that although they answered to the Lord, their actions and words were seen and evaluated by everyone with whom they came in contact. Their testimony was evidence of their authenticity.
“We are careful to be honorable before the Lord, but we also want everyone else to see that we are honorable.” 2 Corinthians 8:21
Secret sins are those that are devastating. The impact isn’t just on the one who commits the sin, but on everyone who knows and loves them. God was clear about secret sin:
“Cursed is anyone who makes an idol—a thing detestable to the LORD, the work of skilled hands—and sets it up in secret.” Deuteronomy 27:15
“‘Cursed be anyone who strikes down his neighbor in secret.'” Deuteronomy 27:24
“Whoever slanders their neighbor in secret, I will put to silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, I will not tolerate.” Psalm 101:5
“The wicked accept bribes in secret to pervert the course of justice.” Proverbs 17:23
Pray that our children would be transparent, not hiding sin and not treasuring it in their heart. “Can a man hide himself in secret places so that I cannot see him? declares the LORD. Do I not fill heaven and earth? declares the LORD.” Jeremiah 23:24 God sees. God knows. He will reveal it- pray that He does. Pray for our sons and daughters to be transparent.
Finally, accountability requires honesty. It is the character quality that allows us to look at ourselves truly, and see our words and actions through the eyes of God and others and to accept the truth of them. No excuses. No blame-shifting.
The prophet, Nathan, brought this very issue to King David after his sin with Bathsheba and his murder of her husband, Uriah. Nathan used an analogy to show David his fault:
““Now a traveler came to the rich man, but the rich man refrained from taking one of his own sheep or cattle to prepare a meal for the traveler who had come to him. Instead, he took the ewe lamb that belonged to the poor man and prepared it for the one who had come to him.” David burned with anger against the man and said to Nathan, “As surely as the LORD lives, the man who did this must die! He must pay for that lamb four times over, because he did such a thing and had no pity.” Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man!” “Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.”” 2 Samuel 12:4-7a, 13a
When we sin and refuse accountability, we not only deceive others into thinking we’re right with God but we deceive ourselves into thinking we’re not walking in darkness. We’re dishonest. Deceit is a tool of Satan. Honesty protects us from falling away.
It is so important that our sons and daughters have accountability with other believers in their walk with the Lord. As children, they were accountable to us, their parents, and we helped shape and guide them. But for most of us, our children are grown, employed, living elsewhere, and our opportunity and ability to speak into their lives is different, less frequent, and without the same impact or authority. It’s likely we are no longer positioned to do that as effectively as others may be.
We need to pray that the Lord would bring accountability partners into the lives of our sons and daughters. People whom they respect and look up to, people who are spiritually mature and who also share accountability with others. Pray that God would show our children the value and importance of being accountable and being open, surrendered, and vulnerable enough to accept their need for accountability.
Accountability is difficult and, sometimes, unpleasant. But it is a safety net to keep us from devastating sin. It is the lens through which God enables us to see ourselves more clearly in order to clean up what is becoming muddied by the world and its influences. It is an assurance, provided by God and aligned with Scripture, to help us maintain a blameless walk with the Lord and a testimony that will bring glory and honor to Him.
“Father, I pray for (name) today that You would bring other believers alongside them to provide encouragement and accountability. Keep them walking with You, not straying off the path, not lingering in shadows or darkness, and not sitting by the wayside, watching sin with interest. Lord, keep them from sin. Put a guard on their eyes. Protect their heart with the breastplate of righteousness and their mind with the helmet of salvation. Impress on them the need for and importance of accountability. Help them to be humble, transparent, honest, and active in a Christian community- a fellowship of believers who would surround them with wisdom, encouragement, and protection. Lord, only You can accomplish this, I pray that you will. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Pray without ceasing.
Full Surrender
“Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!”
“Here I am,” he replied.
Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.””
Genesis 22:1-2
The story of Abraham and Isaac is a powerful one. If we grew up going to church and learning the Bible, we likely were introduced to the story as children: Abraham offering his son Isaac on the altar as God commanded. It may have seemed odd and even cold. But, as children, I doubt many of us understood the deep sacrifice God was asking Abraham to give.
But when we become parents, that story takes on a whole new meaning. Could we even imagine God asking us to sacrifice the life of one of our children as a burnt offering - a sacrifice to Him?! We would be ready to lay down our life for them in a heartbeat, but to take their life as an offering to God? It asks too much…. Or does it?
We hold our relationships with our children very closely, as we should. They are precious and valuable to us. We cherish them. We invest in them. We hold them so dear. But, friends, sometimes our parenting becomes an idol. Sometimes we idolize something that God gifted us and asks us to steward, not worship. We fret and angst. We speak into their choices and relationships. We lose sleep, shed tears, and pray fervently. Yet we hold on so tightly that it may be a struggle to see God in the midst or be willing to allow Him to have His way. We want to protect, to engineer, to bring resolutions to the problems in our own power and wisdom. It’s not godly.
We need to be willing to lay it on the altar. That does not mean we disconnect from our sons and daughters, not at all. Abraham was present and speaking in Isaac’s life right up to the point that he raised the knife. He was parenting, but in submission to God. And Isaac trusted Abraham enough to surrender to what God was asking him to do. That is full surrender and it’s beautiful.
Abraham valued his relationship with God most of all. His trust of God and his obedience to God surpassed his need to cling to and protect Isaac. He was not willing to sacrifice his relationship with God for his son. He trusted that God could do more than he humanly could imagine. That is powerful and that’s the example we need to follow.
Here is a question to ponder: are we possibly holding those relationships dearer than our relationship with the Lord? Are we resisting what God is asking of us in order to preserve what we deem more valuable with our sons and daughters? Are we unwilling to lay them on the altar and allow God to have His way?
Perhaps we are like the parent who takes their child to the Emergency Room because they need skilled care, only to tell the doctor we know what’s best, directing his responses. And instead of trusting his wisdom, skill, and discernment, we stand in the way of his effectiveness. When we bring our children to the Great Physician, we need to trust His skill and care, not direct His responses according to our human wisdom. Lay it all on the altar.
As we step into this new year, it is a perfect time to practice full surrender of all God has given us and blessed us with. Oh, friends, I don’t have this all worked out either. It’s a daily choice to surrender to my Lord and Savior, asking Him to resolve those things that grieve me, the choices my children make that concern me for their future. It’s surrendering the worry over the ‘red flags’ that I see in their lives and relationships. It’s humbly recognizing my place, and my ability and power (or lack thereof) in light of God’s sovereign authority and power to effect change in their lives. He is God, I am not. He is wise, I have limited understanding. He is able, where I will falter and fail. Isn’t it best to trust Him and obey?
Take a few moments and pray. Envision yourself lifting those things that you hold dear and laying them on the altar to give back to God, don’t take them back down again. Place those things you worry over, the choices and relationships your son or daughter is pursuing, on the altar as a sacrifice to God- may He have the glory. You cannot change it, but God can. If we are willing to give it all over to Him and trust Him with the process, we will gain so much freedom and peace.
Our sons and daughters belong to God; they are a gift from Him to us to steward, to raise, to nurture in the knowledge of God. It’s only right and fitting that we give them back to Him so He can have full sway over their lives. Oh, friends, we’re not losing them by giving them to God, we’re opening the channel for Him to work more freely and to use us more effectively.
Maybe a new habit this year is praying a prayer of surrender every morning, laying all of the worries and cares, all of the precious things He’s given you, back onto the altar for Him to use, to bless, to be glorified by in our surrender.
Abraham trusted God more than he trusted his ability to engineer the situation. His trust became a hallmark of his life and it was an incredible example of following God to his son, Issac, and to us. Read Genesis 22:9-18
9 When they reached the place God had told him about, Abraham built an altar there and arranged the wood on it. He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. 10 Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son. 11 But the angel of the Lord called out to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!”
“Here I am,” he replied.
12 “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”
13 Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son. 14 So Abraham called that place The Lord Will Provide. And to this day it is said, “On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.”
The angel of the Lord called to Abraham from heaven a second time 16 and said, “I swear by myself, declares the Lord, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, 17 I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, 18 and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me.””
Is there anything you’re withholding from God today? Take inventory of your life, your relationships, what you value most and hold dear. Choose to give it all to the Lord so that He can have His way. We cannot protect our sons and daughters from what the Lord wills, but we can be an instrument of blessing, wisdom, discernment, and love if we choose to trust God and allow Him to have full control.
Our sons and daughters can learn much from us if we are willing to allow God to have His way, completely. What blessings await because we obey?
“During the days of Jesus' life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with fervent cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission.” Hebrews 5:7
Take some time today to write out a prayer. Date it. Then revisit it through the week, the month, and this year, noting how God is working in their life and in yours. Pray that prayer of surrender every morning, laying all of the worries and cares and all of the precious things He’s given you onto the altar--Full Surrender.
Pray without ceasing.
May He be Glorified.
Are you praying for a prodigal? Don’t lose heart. God sees and He hears. Keep laying your burdens in prayer at the feet of Jesus. Trust Him, He is working. You may not see it, but He works in dimensions that are beyond our comprehension. Pray for those friends and associates that interact with your beloved prodigal, that God would use them to bring them to full surrender to Jesus as Lord.
40 Days of Prayer for the Prodigal is a powerful book for anyone deeply in prayer for the heart of their loved one. The book addresses the battle for the heart, mind, and soul of the prodigal through praying Scripture boldly and consistently with faith that God will bring repentance and restoration. Pray the words of Scripture in powerful and effective ways to plead with God about the condition and situation of your beloved prodigal and watch God work!
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Parenting is Hard, Prayer is Vital
There, I said it. It’s hard. Social media would have you believe it’s all glorious and perfect…with just little hiccups between joyful photo shoots. Nope. It’s hard. It can be painful…and ugly. But parenting is also sacred and worshipful. The Bible shows us from the start that God is our Father and He works to build into us in ways that make us more like Him. Parenting gives us that opportunity to model God’s character and selfless love. It’s not easy, but it’s beautiful and it’s valuable.
As parents, we sometimes make the mistake of thinking that if we can just get through ‘this’ stage, it will be easier. But ask any seasoned parent and they will tell you, with each new stage come new challenges and yes, new joys, too. “I can’t wait until…” is often the mantra of the battle-weary parent, the one who is overwhelmed with sleepless nights, laundry, and diapers. Then, the toddler years arrive and the child seems to have 1000 hands, boundless energy, and insatiable curiosity. I can’t wait until…. School, all the activities, sports, then driving, and dating, and before you know it, they’re off to college and then working, married, and with their own children. How did it go so fast? "I can’t wait until they’re grown and I don’t have to worry any more.” Ah, that is a faulty expectation. When you love someone, you will always carry concern for them, whether they’re 2 or 32. Each new stage of parenting brings new and often more complex prayers.
Our parenting doesn’t end when our sons and daughters become adults. But our prayers change. They move from “Lord, please let them sleep… to Lord, please wake them up, spiritually.” The early years are filled with prayers for their physical growth and safety, along with their spiritual formation. But as they grow and age, our prayer becomes even deeper because, as a parent, we no longer have the daily influence or the ability to steer them away from negative influences and dark places. Our prayers take on a deeply spiritual direction, not that they were not before, but there becomes a greater urgency and a deeper understanding of eternity and their place in it. The physical needs, although still present, are secondary to their eternal state. We feel the heaviness of their spiritual condition and direction, we battle on our knees for protection from spiritual attack, and we plead with the Lord for His intervention…and for their recognition of it.
Parenting doesn’t get ‘easier’ it just shifts to another level of support, concern, and intervention- most of it spiritual. Are you prepared for that?
Some may say, “I don’t know how to pray that way.” Oh friends, prayer isn’t just for the ‘learned’ or those who have a long faith history. Prayer is a practice, a spiritual discipline. You just do it. You start where you are and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. You have a complete handbook to use- the Bible. A great way to begin is by praying scripture over your sons and daughters; God’s word never returns void. It is guaranteed to bear fruit.
Remember, God works outside of time and space. He sees the end from the beginning. He’s weaving people, events, places, and resources together in ways we cannot begin to comprehend all to bring about that which He wills. When we pray, we not only need to lift up our sons and daughters, but we need to pray for our own heart, that we would be surrendered to what God wants and that He would align our desires with His will. Be cautious. Too often we pray with an answer or conclusion in mind. Let God lead.
Today, let’s do just that. Let’s pray Philippians 1:9-11. It’s straightforward and powerful. Write it down and carry it with you this week and pray for your sons and daughters that God would do a work in their lives, reflective of the passage.
“And this is my prayer: that (name)’s love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that (name) may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.” In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Pray without ceasing.
What IS Perfect Love?
Ah, we all long for that ‘perfect love’ don’t we? As parents, we hope and pray our sons and daughters will find ‘the one’. When the main character looks at his love interest and says, “You complete me”, we melt and hope that someone, someday, would say the same to us. We all love a sweet love story and a beautiful wedding. We gush over the newlyweds as the “perfect couple” with a perfect love. Everything is rosy.
And then life happens. What was once beautiful can become ugly. What was once perfect compatibility becomes irreconcilable differences. Love as we know it can fade and cool. Its endurance and length of days are terminal. Love is used as a tool for manipulation, a weapon to gain control, a bargaining chip to leverage and win battles. It is meted out to those ‘deserving’ of it and withheld from those who do not. There are separations and divorces, and attempts to try again, after the healing. Love between two people will never be perfect because we’re all flawed and sinful and in reality, perfect love seems elusive. We are prone to hurt one another because, at the heart, we are selfish people, aren’t we? We all want and need something in return. And when we look to another flawed person to fill that void, we expect them to provide something that, in their limited capacity, they cannot perfectly supply.
And those are the parameters by which we, as fallen sinners, learn to define love. We are finite and our experiences and understanding are as well. We have an incorrect, even corrupt, understanding of love. We must ask, are we setting our sons and daughters up for a Biblical understanding of love, especially if we’ve experienced flawed relationships, hurt, pain, and disappointment ourselves. What have our sons and daughters witnessed to shape their understanding of love?
God tells us, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18. What is perfect love? The word perfect in Greek is the word “telios” which means to be complete, lacking nothing to be brought to full completion (1). And love, agape, means affection, goodwill or benevolence, to be charitable (see a need and move to fill it) (2).
But nothing we see around us seems to fit that description, does it? And love, the lack of love, the need for love and the attempt to find love can generate such fear and heart-crushing disappointment. Oh, friends, this is a prayer point that should drive us ALL to our knees- that we, our sons, and our daughters would have a correct, Biblical understanding of love.
Let’s look at perfect love through Scripture:
First, the focus of perfect love never resides with another person, but with God Himself. When we look to another human being, even those who are in the family of God, to provide perfect love, we are expecting them to deliver something that exceeds their capacity and capability. No man (or woman) is perfect. Yes, they can mirror and reflect Christ, but they will never be perfect. Perfect Love is from and in Christ. His love is limitless, boundless, and eternal.
John 15:13 “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
Jesus demonstrated that perfect love for us when He gave His life on the cross to pay for our sins and make a way for us to be justified, redeemed and restored to the Father.
Romans 5:8 “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Perfect love is only and always generated from and sustained by God Himself.
Second, God’s love will never fade or become incompatible with us. His love will not cool. He will never become disinterested or disillusioned. His is the ministry of reconciliation, always working and moving to bring us into intimate fellowship with Himself. He’s always reaching out and drawing in.
Colossians 1:19-20 “For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in Him (Christ), and through Him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.”
Romans 5:17-19 “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation.”
Third, God will always, always, always remain faithful. There is nothing we can do to make Him not love us. He won’t find comfort in the arms of another. He IS perfect love and so He doesn’t need to look elsewhere for it nor does He need us to fulfill His needs. No, He chooses to love us unconditionally so that we will find our complete fulfillment in Him! He completes us!
2 Timothy 2:13 “if we are faithless, He remains faithful, for he cannot disown Himself.”
Deuteronomy 7:9 “Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments.”
Fourth, our limited minds will always struggle to comprehend the unlimited magnitude of God’s love. Though we try, we always default to what we know and have experienced, and thereby we evaluate God’s love by our own experiences. But that is faulty and, honestly, that’s sinful. We must teach our sons and daughters to have spiritual discretion, Scriptural wisdom and a heart and mind trained to hear the Holy Spirit and submit to and follow His teaching. We cannot judge God by human standards, nor can we gauge His love by what we know in this fallen world. The Apostle Paul gave us a powerful explanation in Ephesians 1.
“Among the mature, however, we speak a message of wisdom—but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing.” Ephesians 1:6
The rulers of this age love to tell us what we should believe and how we should think based on their own ‘wisdom’. They continually trot out their standard of “perfect love” that, given time, shows itself as short-lived, broken, and incapable of truly meeting the needs of the ‘other’. It’s faulty.
“Rather, as it is written: “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no heart has imagined, what God has prepared for those who love Him.” But God has revealed it to us by the Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God.” Ephesians 1:9-10
God’s love far exceeds what we could EVER imagine!! Isn’t that mind-blowing? Nothing we’ve ever seen or experienced comes close. It IS perfect, complete, and lacking nothing. And it can be ours. What joy!! What mind-blowing generosity!! Pure, perfect love meeting all our needs and providing eternal security, provision and protection!
Oh that we and our sons and daughters would understand the true and perfect love of God. Let’s be careful not to create our expectation or judgment of perfect love based on what we see around us. Let’s always be cautious and only look to Jesus as our example and as the true lover of our souls. And then, let’s rely on the Holy Spirit to help us live like Jesus toward others, showing selfless, faithful love that isn’t based on what someone does for us, but offered freely because God loves them and created them in His likeness.
Today, let’s pray Ephesians 3:14-19 for our sons and daughters, asking God to help them get a glimpse of His perfect love that will eclipse anything and everything they know and have experienced yet in this life. Go on, pray boldly! Pray with hope! Our God wants to lavish His love on us freely and continually!
“Father, Abba, the One who loves me dearly, I pray in Your Son’s name that You would work in (name)’s heart today. “For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen (name) with power through his Spirit in (their) inner being, so that Christ may dwell in (name)’s heart through faith. And I pray that (name), being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that (name) may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” May it be so, Lord Jesus. Amen.”
Pray without ceasing.
G5046 - teleios - Strong's Greek Lexicon (niv). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g5046/niv/mgnt/0-1/
G26 - agapē - Strong's Greek Lexicon (niv). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g26/niv/mgnt/0-1/