Do You Want More than Just the “Motions” of Prayer?
Here at Join the PAC Prayer we cover topics of prayer and encouragement that help us pray effectively for our adult children and other loved ones. We talk about the ‘stuff of life’, the heartaches, the joys, the dangers, and the eternal truths that God reminds us of in His word.
But it’s good to stop and think about the process of prayer, too. We often focus on what we are praying, but do we think about howwe are praying? How are we approaching God? What is our heart posture? What is our mindset? What is our purpose in prayer?
Prayer Traps
Recently I watched a bit of The Master’s golf tournament. I’m not a big of golf, but it was intriguing. The players are so skilled. But even with all their ability and experience, several of them hit their golf ball and it veered off in a direction they didn’t want it to go and they ended up in a sand trap. They were stuck and had to take more strokes to get to the hole. It became a diversion to the goal.
As we pray, we can find ourselves in ‘prayer traps’ that redirect our prayers and our attention and our hearts to those things that are not productive or God-honoring. We run the risk of saying empty words and just going through the motions.
One-sided prayer:
Have you ever had a conversation with someone who does all the talking, doesn’t take time to ask about you or listen to what is important in your life, and then finishes the conversation and goes off as if all is good. You’re left feeling unimportant, unheard, and kind of used.
When we only approach God for our needs and wants without addressing Him, glorifying and worshipping Him, and listening to Him, we are really having a one-sided conversation that fails to step into the fullness of prayer. Prayer is a sweet communion between us and God. We shouldn’t cheat ourselves out of the blessing of hearing from God and worshipping His greatness.
“‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.”
Matthew 15:8
Expecting Quick Delivery:
Too often we fall into a pattern of treating prayer like a fast-food drive through. We pull up, place our order and then wait (impatiently) for our order to be handed to us in a matter of moments or, at the least, days. It becomes impersonal and selfish. We asked for it, God should deliver it, right?
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance
about what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1
God proves His faithfulness over and over. Sometimes He takes us to the brink only to show His greatness in ways that will crush any doubt and fill our hearts with unwavering commitment to Him.
God could have delivered the Israelites after one plague, but He didn’t. But why? He knew we needed the testimony and power of ten plagues in the process of God’s deliverance. He wanted a powerful story that would last for thousands of years and be recounted through generations to remind His children of His goodness, protection, and deliverance. He wanted us to have every Red Sea, manna from heaven, water from the rock moment to bolster our faith and remind us of His faithfulness, His power, His plan.
Without the testimony of God’s powerful deliverance, we would be spoiled believers who use God for our own means rather than being surrendered believers, relying on Him for our every breath and life.
An Attitude of “Deserving”:
Another trap we fall into is the ‘deserving’ trap. We buy into the performative posture. Because we ‘do’, we ‘deserve’. We view our value to God based on what we accomplish for Him- teaching Sunday School, evangelizing, leading worship, writing a blog or speaking to gatherings, the list goes on. But God wants relationships, not performance. He wants authenticity, not production. He doesn’t redeem us so we can be producers, He redeems us so we can worship Him and be in fellowship with Him.
“He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done,
but because of His mercy.”
Titus 3:5a
We are God’s family, not His employees. When we talk to God, He wants us to approach Him as our Father, not our HR rep. Begin with a mindset that fully understands the depth of mercy He’s lavished on us. That changes our mindset, our posture, our heart. We were devastatingly lost in our sin, yet He died for us to redeem us. He loved us in even when we were in our detestable state of sin, drowning in darkness, unworthy, without merit, and without hope.
Are we deserving? No. Is He gracious and merciful? Absolutely. Remember that as you approach Him in prayer.
A Pattern for Prayer
King David gives us a great pattern for prayer throughout the Psalms. Is this the only way to pray? No, but it’s a great example and actually one that Jesus followed in the Lord’s prayer. Let’s take a look:
First, exalt God.
“I will bless the LORD at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul will make its boast in the LORD; the humble will hear it and rejoice. O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together.”
Psalm 34:1-3
Before you ask for anything, focus on God’s character and nature. Spend time in worship and praise of Who He is. Set your heart and mind in the right posture to begin an authentic, effective conversation with the Almighty. He already knows what you will ask and what weighs heavily on your heart. Don’t rush into the requests. Take time to rest in Who He is. Don’t simply be a consumer.
“Ascribe to the LORD, O families of nations, ascribe to the LORD glory and strength. Ascribe to the LORD the glory due His name; bring an offering and come into His courts.”
Psalm 96:7-8
Recall His works and wonders.
“Come and hear, all who fear God, and I will tell of what He has done for my soul.”
Psalm 66:16
Thank Him for the Red Sea rescue, for the widow’s oil that didn’t run out, for being the God who stood and triumphed against the hundred prophets of Baal, the God who healed leprosy, crippled legs, blind eyes and deaf ears, the God who defeated death and paid for sin with His own life. Record those miracles and wonders from scripture so you have a go-to list to remind yourself of His power and provision. List the amazing things God’s done for you and shown you and thank Him for them. Remind yourself of His greatness and provision. It sets the tone for your upcoming requests and reminds you that nothing is too hard for Him. He sees. He hears. He acts. Believe Him.
“LORD, I have heard of your fame; I stand in awe of your deeds, LORD. Repeat them in our day, in our time make them known; in wrath remember mercy.”
Habakkuk 3:2
Surrender yourself to Him, ensure your heart is right.
Confess any lingering sin or offense. Scripture tells us again and again that our heart condition is important to God.
“If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened;”
Psalm 66:18
If we want effective communion with the Lord, we need to ensure there is nothing that stands between us and Him.
“The LORD is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.”
Proverbs 15:29
Humble yourself before the Lord. Allow Him to reveal what needs to be confessed. Let Him show you if there are idols that need to be displaced. Ask Him to soften your heart and make it right with Him.
“For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”
1 Peter 3:12
Pray
Pour out your heart to the One Who created you.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
Philippians 4:6
Throughout Scripture there are many different descriptions of prayer from crying out to quietly meditating. Prayer can be shouting in grief or joy, and interceding for ourselves and others. There is no ‘right’ volume or words. When we pray, we step past the veil into a spiritual realm that we cannot see but our spirits understand and where Jesus is our High Priest. He advocates for us in ways that no other will. He loves us. He protects us. He provides. Take time to dwell in that space and enjoy His presence.
Wait in hope
God always answers. Always. But His timing does not match our own. He exists outside of time and space and He holds all of history that has been and is yet to come in His scope as He works. Everything He does is interwoven with Who He is and with His plan for mankind. Trust His work.
“I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.”
Psalm 130:5
When we had children, it wasn’t simply to ‘get a child’ but to grow that relationship, watch how they learned, explored, and deepened their understanding of themselves, their family, and the world. The answer to our prayer for a child wasn’t just in the delivery (whether by birth or adoption) but in the unfolding of the whole experience of parenthood.
Prayer is similar. We should not just be there for the answer, but for the unfolding of the process and how it grows us. Waiting in hope deepens our faith. It shows us the depths of God’s love, care, and faithfulness- His ‘hesed’ (Hebrew). Hesed is God’s covenant faithfulness, His powerful merciful kindness that has our best at the heart of His work and His ways. Everything God does is ultimately pointed toward His will and plan to bring everything under His authority and rule, to bring Shalom- to set everything at one again, a step back to the garden before the fall. As you wait, remind yourself of the words “shalom” and “hesed”. There is purpose in the waiting. Don’t let your impatience and your longing overshadow His work.
Journal
How often do we hear or experience something and say “That’s something I’ll never forget!”, and yet, we do forget. Those powerful examples that God gives us often become dim or clouded when we’re desperate, struggling, longing for an answer. Journaling is a testament not only to ourselves, but to those who follow. It is a legacy of faith that attests to what God has done and how we learned to follow after Him. Because, if we’re honest, though we pray for answers to our prayers, our deepest longing is more of Him. When we stand in eternity, we won’t cling to that car, that job, that friend or family member, we will cling to Jesus and praise Him.
“We have heard with our ears, O God; our fathers have told us what You did in their days, in days long ago. It was not with their sword that they won the land, nor did their arm bring them victory; it was Your right hand, Your arm, for you loved them.”
Psalm 44:2-3
We want to ensure we leave a Godly heritage for our children and pass along generational blessings. What a treasure to have a record of what God did in a life!
“But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD’s love is with those who fear Him, and His righteousness with their children’s children—with those who keep His covenant and remember to obey His precepts.”
Psalm 103:17-18
Prayer is a beautiful, powerful communion with God that can take you deeper into fellowship with Him and strengthen your faith. There is no ‘perfect’ way to pray. God just wants to talk with you. Step into that conversation and listen for His voice.
I’ve created a printable you can use for this format of prayer. There are two versions, fancy or plain. Feel free to print them and share them. My prayer is that it will help you grow in your prayer life and deepen and enrich your time with the Lord.
Pray without ceasing, friends!
Are Our Kids Pretending?
“Others, like seed sown on rocky places, hear the word and at once receive it with joy. But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away.. Others, like seed sown on good soil, hear the word, accept it, and produce a crop--thirty, sixty or even a hundred times what was sown." Mark 4:16-17, 20
My sister and I recently went through our mother’s hope chest, a large wooden chest, lined with cedar, that holds sweet mementos and family treasures. We found cards congratulating them on their marriage, then cards celebrating a coming child. Among the things inside were her wedding dress and our father’s military uniform jacket. We pulled out the jacket and held it up. It was a pensive moment, seeing his jacket and remembering all we loved about Dad. Had I put it on, it may have fit me, but it wouldn’t mean I was a member of the U.S. Air Force. The jacket wasn’t mine. I couldn’t wear it and step into active service, because the simple act of putting on my father’s uniform didn’t qualify me to serve. When people do this and try to convince others of heroic service it’s called ‘stolen valor’ and is considered fraudulent and treated as a crime. It perpetuates a lie.
When it comes to faith, it’s much the same. When you stand before God, you cannot ‘wear’ that which belongs to your parents or grandparents. You must have your own. Faith isn’t inherited. It is personally embraced, believed, and followed, individually, and intentionally. It is personal and purposeful for each one who chooses to follow Jesus by their own will and conviction. We can’t consider ourselves a follower of Christ just because a family member was or is. No, we must choose to follow because we are persuaded and convicted in our spirit that Jesus is Lord and Savior and there is no other name by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12). And God doesn’t see our sons and daughters as believers just because we are. Read that again.
Mark 4 talks about this very thing in regards to faith. The passage in Mark 4 discusses the ‘seed’ or the truth of the gospel as it reaches people’s hearts. Mark uses two distinct words (underlined to highlight) that show the difference between those who casually know about Jesus and those who choose to follow Him.
Mark 4:16 discusses those who receive the word, with joy, yet, their faith doesn’t ‘stick’. It doesn’t take root…why? The word receive is the Greek word lambano it means “to take with the hand, lay hold of, any person or thing in order to use it (1).” You can receive something, even with joy, and then set it aside. It remains unused, almost unclaimed. You took it, but didn’t do anything with it. You may receive the sweater Grandma knitted for you. You thank the giver, but if you never wear it, did you ever really identify with the gift? Did you make it your own? No, it hangs in the closet, unused, impersonal, ineffective because you didn’t choose to make it your own. You received it, then turned away.
But Mark 4:20 explains a different scene, “Others, like seed sown on good soil, hear the word, accept it, and produce a crop…” The difference here is that they accept the Word.
The word accept is the Greek word paradechomai and it means “to delight in, receive, take upon oneself”(2), it’s a choice to take on what is offered, to put it on and make it your own. It was made for you, not another, and you embrace the gift.
But if, when Grandma gives you that sweater, you put it on and take delight in accepting the gift; you make it your own. The sweater becomes part of your person and you identify yourself with the gift, demonstrating that you received it, accepted it, and delight in it. That is true acceptance. You allow others to see you in that sweater. They know it is yours. You didn’t swipe it out of someone else’s closet, and you didn’t simply try to put your name on something that belongs to someone else. No, the sweater was made for you and you wear it proudly. That is acceptance.
When we stand before the Throne and answer to God for our choices, for who and what we chose to worship, we cannot rely on the faith of another. We cannot say, “My mother believed in You and so I’m counted worthy.” “My father followed Jesus faithfully, so I’m covered.” No, faith is individual and each one must make the choice for themselves. God extends His gift of salvation to each one. Yes, generations can follow Jesus, but each individual person decides for themselves. It is not inherited or passed along. It’s not assumed that because a parent believes in Jesus, the children are covered.
We must choose for ourselves Who we will serve and then live out our faith with confidence, conviction, and a personal pursuit of holiness allowing the Holy Spirit to move and work in our hearts, teach us, convict us, comfort and sustain us until we stand before the Lord when our life here is through. When God looks on us, He sees Jesus because we accepted Jesus as the substitutionary sacrifice for our sin. We don’t have to pay for our sin- Jesus did. But unless we accept Him as our Lord and Savior, we are lost.
John 1:12 says, “Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God–”
Here are some questions to ponder:
Do you know Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, or are you resting on someone else’s faith, hoping that it will qualify you for redemption and eternal life?
Did you ‘receive’ faith but you failed to accept it as your own?
Friend, today is the day. Will you choose to surrender your heart to Jesus Christ or will you set Him aside? And will our sons and daughters make their faith their own or will they believe the delusion that they can slide into heaven on the faith of their parents?
How do you accept Jesus as Lord?
Simply pray this prayer, “Lord Jesus, I confess I am a sinner- I think, say, and do things that are wrong. I am selfish. I am broken. But I believe You died on the cross to pay for my sin. You took the punishment I deserved so I would not have to suffer. You were buried and then rose from the grave, conquering death and sin, once for all. I believe You are my Lord and Savior. You are the One I choose to follow, yield to, and worship. Fill me with Your Holy Spirit. Give me joy, peace, and eternal life beyond the grave. I pray that You would make me new and allow others to see that I am not who I was, but I am made new in Jesus Christ. It’s in Jesus’ name I pray, amen.”
If you prayed this prayer, I would love to hear from you! If you’re unsure and have questions, reach out!
Choosing to put your faith in and follow Jesus is not difficult. Some may say it’s too simple. But that’s the thing…salvation is not based on our doing, it’s based on our believing and surrendering to God so He can do the work in us.
“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9
I am praying for each one of you who reads this. I’m praying for your sons and daughters, too, that those who need to know Jesus as Lord and Savior would come to Him. I’m praying that those who follow Jesus and identify with Him would let it be evident in their lives: their words and their actions.
Don’t grow weary in praying for your sons and daughters. God isn’t finished working. “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9
Are you praying for a prodigal? The same holds true. God is not finished. He has a plan that is beyond our comprehension and perception. Trust Him. Continue praying. He is working all things for our good and His glory. Praise Him!
Pray without ceasing.
G2983 - lambanō - Strong's Greek Lexicon (niv). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g2983/niv/mgnt/0-1/G3858 - paradechomai - Strong's Greek Lexicon (niv). Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g3858/niv/mgnt/0-1/
Praying Psalm 145:1-4
This week we are going to pray through Psalm 145, verse by verse. No devotional. No extra thoughts. Just praying God’s word and watching it work powerfully in and through us.
Each day we’ll take a portion and pray it back to the Lord on behalf of our sons and daughters.
Journal what you see and learn this week as you pray. It will become a testimony for later days and future generations.
Psalm 145
1 I will exalt you, my God the King;
I will praise your name for ever and ever.
Lord, I ask today that You would enable my sons and daughters to exalt You. Fill them with wonder at the thought of You. Let their words and actions lift you high. May their life bring glory to Your name. I pray that they would deeply desire to live a life that honors You. Give them strength to praise You forever and ever.
2 Every day I will praise you
and extol your name for ever and ever.
Father, I pray that every day (name) would praise you. Let praise fill their heart and spill out of their lips. Let praise of You be a habit they will not abandon, because Your word says you inhabit the praise of your people. May (name) bless You every morning as they see You work, and Lord, let them see you work, clearly and powerfully so they will never cease their praise and wonder of You.
3 Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise;
his greatness no one can fathom.
You are worthy, Lord, of all our praise. I pray that (name) would be amazed and in awe of Who You are and what You do. Lord, never allow us to be satisfied with our knowledge and understanding of You, because that would mean we’ve stopped seeking more of You. You are so much greater than we can imagine and understand. Just as it is impossible to fathom the depths of the deepest seas, so Lord, it is even more impossible to fathom all of You- the immortal, invisible, almighty God.
4 One generation will commend your works to another;
they will tell of your mighty acts.
Oh, Lord, how I pray that my sons and daughters would commend your works to the next generation and that the legacy of believers would continue in our family. Let (name) tell of your mighty acts- all the wonderful ways You’ve provided, protected and led our family through danger, hardship and grief. Let (name) boldly share the blessings You’ve given. May the joy that You pour into to those who love You be evident in (name)’s life. Let my children, my grandchildren and their children after them know Jesus, love Him and commit their lives to Him. May our family be mighty in our faith and humble in our following and may You bless us with generations who will follow after You faithfully, in Jesus’ name, amen.
(Maybe you have a family heritage of believers, or maybe you are the start of that heritage- either way, pray that the Lord continues the testimony of His saving grace through your family. What a beautiful legacy to pass on!)
Tomorrow we’ll pray through verses 5-7
Faithful Through the Generations
Deuteronomy 7:9 “Know therefore that the LORD your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations,”
Often when we gather as families, we reminisce about significant events, fun times, funny things that happened to us. We laugh and recall with joy those things that stand out in our memories. But do we take time to recount the ways God has been good to us? Do we really share the miraculous and mundane ways God made Himself known?
Friends, if we are believers, we are building a legacy of faith for our children, grandchildren and generations yet to come, if the Lord tarries. It’s hard to imagine next week, but a thousand generations? Yet, this is what God promises!! It’s likely very few people in history thought their story would have significance, yet, how beautiful is it to read stories of those who lived faithfully for the Lord? What about the stories of those who left all they knew to carry the gospel to another land and people? They were doing what God called them to- yet we learn so much about His faithfulness in the midst of their daily obedience. What is it that we want our children, grandchildren and future generations to know about God’s faithfulness to us?
Let’s be bold and share those stories of God’s faithfulness. Write them down. Share them with your family. Record them where they can be heard. Someone, someday, will read or hear them and be encouraged. They will become the treasured stories that evidence God’s goodness and faithfulness to your family through the generations. What accounts of God’s faithfulness can you recall today?
Today, take some time to write out the accounts of God’s faithfulness to you...then share it with your sons and daughters. It may feel awkward at first, but go on and do it. The more you testify, the more excited and appreciative you will be of God’s faithfulness and the more you will come to love Him. Create those ‘Stones of Remembrance’ so that when future generations ask “What is that?” You can beautifully testify to God’s loving faithfulness to you...and to them!
Pray without ceasing!