The Importance of Accountability
We’ve all heard the stories of Christian leaders whose lives impacted many and whose words were followed with conviction and enthusiasm. We’ve followed some of them, only later to learn that the individual was entertaining sin, deep, grievous sin that disqualified them from ministry. Sin that was always at the expense of others who trusted them. Sin that was dark, nasty, and contradictory to their message and their persona. And one of the biggest factors involved was accountability…or the lack thereof. A big red flag for someone’s character (or lack thereof) is a resistance to accountability and push back towards those who ask it of them.
No one is so great that they cannot be held accountable. No one has such a powerful ministry that another believer cannot question their actions, words, and choices in an honest and Biblical way. If that happens and the individual is not willing to be transparent, that’s a huge red flag.
But it doesn’t just apply to leaders. We are ALL to be accountable for our lives because it is what keeps us following Christ authentically and helps us avoid the traps of sin and temptation. There is no one who does not need accountability. We are all sinners, saved by grace. And we all struggle with that fleshly temptation to revert back to what we once were. The challenge and the deception is that we think we can control it. Yet, it ends up controlling us. Accountability deters that.
Effective accountability requires several things: humility, community, transparency, and honesty. If someone is resistant to any of those, that is a red flag.
Humility
We are to follow the example of Christ, who humbled himself to whatever the Father willed. It is a willingness to allow your life to be open to others.
“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.” Philippians 2:3-7
We spent a lot of time building up our kids, encouraging them, cultivating leadership and character, but did we emphasize humility? It’s a quality that is valued and needed. It reflects Christ, and it positions the individual to look at themselves, their actions, choices, and words with honesty. Pray for humility.
Accountability requires community. Someone who operates alone answers to a committee of one. Whatever they choose to do is self-approved, self-supported, and self-celebrated. When someone pushes others away, or intimidates those around them into silence, that is not only abuse of position and power, it is arrogance and self-importance. It is a blatant sin. Godly community helps us remain aligned with right practices and respect for God and his expectations for us.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
We didn’t isolate our children as we raised them. We ensured they had good friends, other families who lived and believed as we did to influence them, because we understood the value of the ‘village’. But as children grow into adulthood, they do not always retain the values and practices with which they were raised or see the importance of holding protections in place. .Pray for Godly community that would speak into their lives and influence them with Christ-likeness.
Accountability requires transparency. Paul and Titus wanted to ensure their ministry was God-honoring and gave evidence of that to everyone they encountered. They understood that although they answered to the Lord, their actions and words were seen and evaluated by everyone with whom they came in contact. Their testimony was evidence of their authenticity.
“We are careful to be honorable before the Lord, but we also want everyone else to see that we are honorable.” 2 Corinthians 8:21
Secret sins are those that are devastating. The impact isn’t just on the one who commits the sin, but on everyone who knows and loves them. God was clear about secret sin:
“Cursed is anyone who makes an idol—a thing detestable to the LORD, the work of skilled hands—and sets it up in secret.” Deuteronomy 27:15
“‘Cursed be anyone who strikes down his neighbor in secret.'” Deuteronomy 27:24
“Whoever slanders their neighbor in secret, I will put to silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, I will not tolerate.” Psalm 101:5
“The wicked accept bribes in secret to pervert the course of justice.” Proverbs 17:23
Pray that our children would be transparent, not hiding sin and not treasuring it in their heart. “Can a man hide himself in secret places so that I cannot see him? declares the LORD. Do I not fill heaven and earth? declares the LORD.” Jeremiah 23:24 God sees. God knows. He will reveal it- pray that He does. Pray for our sons and daughters to be transparent.
Finally, accountability requires honesty. It is the character quality that allows us to look at ourselves truly, and see our words and actions through the eyes of God and others and to accept the truth of them. No excuses. No blame-shifting.
The prophet, Nathan, brought this very issue to King David after his sin with Bathsheba and his murder of her husband, Uriah. Nathan used an analogy to show David his fault:
““Now a traveler came to the rich man, but the rich man refrained from taking one of his own sheep or cattle to prepare a meal for the traveler who had come to him. Instead, he took the ewe lamb that belonged to the poor man and prepared it for the one who had come to him.” David burned with anger against the man and said to Nathan, “As surely as the LORD lives, the man who did this must die! He must pay for that lamb four times over, because he did such a thing and had no pity.” Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man!” “Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.”” 2 Samuel 12:4-7a, 13a
When we sin and refuse accountability, we not only deceive others into thinking we’re right with God but we deceive ourselves into thinking we’re not walking in darkness. We’re dishonest. Deceit is a tool of Satan. Honesty protects us from falling away.
It is so important that our sons and daughters have accountability with other believers in their walk with the Lord. As children, they were accountable to us, their parents, and we helped shape and guide them. But for most of us, our children are grown, employed, living elsewhere, and our opportunity and ability to speak into their lives is different, less frequent, and without the same impact or authority. It’s likely we are no longer positioned to do that as effectively as others may be.
We need to pray that the Lord would bring accountability partners into the lives of our sons and daughters. People whom they respect and look up to, people who are spiritually mature and who also share accountability with others. Pray that God would show our children the value and importance of being accountable and being open, surrendered, and vulnerable enough to accept their need for accountability.
Accountability is difficult and, sometimes, unpleasant. But it is a safety net to keep us from devastating sin. It is the lens through which God enables us to see ourselves more clearly in order to clean up what is becoming muddied by the world and its influences. It is an assurance, provided by God and aligned with Scripture, to help us maintain a blameless walk with the Lord and a testimony that will bring glory and honor to Him.
“Father, I pray for (name) today that You would bring other believers alongside them to provide encouragement and accountability. Keep them walking with You, not straying off the path, not lingering in shadows or darkness, and not sitting by the wayside, watching sin with interest. Lord, keep them from sin. Put a guard on their eyes. Protect their heart with the breastplate of righteousness and their mind with the helmet of salvation. Impress on them the need for and importance of accountability. Help them to be humble, transparent, honest, and active in a Christian community- a fellowship of believers who would surround them with wisdom, encouragement, and protection. Lord, only You can accomplish this, I pray that you will. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Pray without ceasing.
Hungry Lambs
Recently I read a story about a family raising a flock of sheep on their farm. One of the lambs was orphaned and needed special attention or it would fail to thrive. The father brought the lamb into the house and the family bottle fed it, kept it warm and socialized it. Soon, it was a part of the family, following them around and enjoying life in the house. But eventually, the time came for the lamb to return to the flock. They took the lamb outside, put it in the pen with the other sheep and went back inside for the night. Except that the lamb didn’t want to be with the flock, in the dark, outside. It knew what life was like inside the house with the father. It cried and fussed and longed to be back in the house. Soon the family realized that, at least for the time being, it was better to bring the lamb back inside so everyone would get rest that night.
I Peter 2:2-3 “Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation—if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good.”
That little lamb knew what it was like to be fed in the father’s house, and because he knew it was good and plentiful, it’s what he desired. The lamb cried and cried until it was let back into the house where he knew he would be fed. It mattered to him.
It made me think, have our children enjoyed intimate closeness with God so that they long to be in His presence? Are they eager to return to His house to spend time with Him? If asked, would they rather be with Him than not?
Psalm 16:11 “You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”
As parents, it is our duty, our responsibility to continue praying for our sons and daughters, even when they’re grown. We need to pray that they know what it’s like to be fed in the house of the Lord, with the words of the Word, nourishing and satisfying their souls. Oh that they would crave the spiritual food that would grow their faith, strengthen their knowledge and understanding, and deepen their love!
1 Chronicles 16:11 “Seek the LORD and His strength; seek His presence continually!”
Today, let’s pray that our sons and daughters seek the Lord continually, not just on Sunday, but every day. Pray that their deepest longing would be to know Him more, to be filled with the Holy Spirit, and to grow in their ‘epignosis’- their precise and correct knowledge of Him.
“Heavenly Father, You are a good Shepherd. You lead us into lush green pastures and beside still waters so that our hunger and thirst are satisfied with the best You can offer. Lord I pray for (name) today, let their spiritual hunger lead them straight to You. Don’t let them look aside to spiritual ‘fast food’ that is inch deep and overprocessed with thoughts and feelings of others. No, lead them straight to the Word where they can be filled with Truth that will change their life and draw them nearer to You. I pray that (name) would taste and see that You are good and in that, they would be spoiled for anything else. Lord help them to find joy in Your Presence so that they are continuously drawn back, again and again, to spend time with You. Lord, help me, as their parent, to model that. I pray that I would seek the Lord and His strength and His presence continually. Allow (name) to see an example in me of what it means to pursue God and find joy and pleasure in Him. I pray this in Jesus’ name, amen.”
Pray without ceasing.
Friends, can I ask a favor? If you’ve purchased and/or read 40 Days of Prayer for the Prodigal, would you be willing to leave a review? I’m so convicted that this book can bring hope and encouragement to those praying for prodigals and I am praying God would use it mightily. Your review can help point those looking for solid Biblical resources to this book. Thank you!