Do You Want More than Just the “Motions” of Prayer?
Here at Join the PAC Prayer we cover topics of prayer and encouragement that help us pray effectively for our adult children and other loved ones. We talk about the ‘stuff of life’, the heartaches, the joys, the dangers, and the eternal truths that God reminds us of in His word.
But it’s good to stop and think about the process of prayer, too. We often focus on what we are praying, but do we think about howwe are praying? How are we approaching God? What is our heart posture? What is our mindset? What is our purpose in prayer?
Prayer Traps
Recently I watched a bit of The Master’s golf tournament. I’m not a big of golf, but it was intriguing. The players are so skilled. But even with all their ability and experience, several of them hit their golf ball and it veered off in a direction they didn’t want it to go and they ended up in a sand trap. They were stuck and had to take more strokes to get to the hole. It became a diversion to the goal.
As we pray, we can find ourselves in ‘prayer traps’ that redirect our prayers and our attention and our hearts to those things that are not productive or God-honoring. We run the risk of saying empty words and just going through the motions.
One-sided prayer:
Have you ever had a conversation with someone who does all the talking, doesn’t take time to ask about you or listen to what is important in your life, and then finishes the conversation and goes off as if all is good. You’re left feeling unimportant, unheard, and kind of used.
When we only approach God for our needs and wants without addressing Him, glorifying and worshipping Him, and listening to Him, we are really having a one-sided conversation that fails to step into the fullness of prayer. Prayer is a sweet communion between us and God. We shouldn’t cheat ourselves out of the blessing of hearing from God and worshipping His greatness.
“‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.”
Matthew 15:8
Expecting Quick Delivery:
Too often we fall into a pattern of treating prayer like a fast-food drive through. We pull up, place our order and then wait (impatiently) for our order to be handed to us in a matter of moments or, at the least, days. It becomes impersonal and selfish. We asked for it, God should deliver it, right?
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance
about what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1
God proves His faithfulness over and over. Sometimes He takes us to the brink only to show His greatness in ways that will crush any doubt and fill our hearts with unwavering commitment to Him.
God could have delivered the Israelites after one plague, but He didn’t. But why? He knew we needed the testimony and power of ten plagues in the process of God’s deliverance. He wanted a powerful story that would last for thousands of years and be recounted through generations to remind His children of His goodness, protection, and deliverance. He wanted us to have every Red Sea, manna from heaven, water from the rock moment to bolster our faith and remind us of His faithfulness, His power, His plan.
Without the testimony of God’s powerful deliverance, we would be spoiled believers who use God for our own means rather than being surrendered believers, relying on Him for our every breath and life.
An Attitude of “Deserving”:
Another trap we fall into is the ‘deserving’ trap. We buy into the performative posture. Because we ‘do’, we ‘deserve’. We view our value to God based on what we accomplish for Him- teaching Sunday School, evangelizing, leading worship, writing a blog or speaking to gatherings, the list goes on. But God wants relationships, not performance. He wants authenticity, not production. He doesn’t redeem us so we can be producers, He redeems us so we can worship Him and be in fellowship with Him.
“He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done,
but because of His mercy.”
Titus 3:5a
We are God’s family, not His employees. When we talk to God, He wants us to approach Him as our Father, not our HR rep. Begin with a mindset that fully understands the depth of mercy He’s lavished on us. That changes our mindset, our posture, our heart. We were devastatingly lost in our sin, yet He died for us to redeem us. He loved us in even when we were in our detestable state of sin, drowning in darkness, unworthy, without merit, and without hope.
Are we deserving? No. Is He gracious and merciful? Absolutely. Remember that as you approach Him in prayer.
A Pattern for Prayer
King David gives us a great pattern for prayer throughout the Psalms. Is this the only way to pray? No, but it’s a great example and actually one that Jesus followed in the Lord’s prayer. Let’s take a look:
First, exalt God.
“I will bless the LORD at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul will make its boast in the LORD; the humble will hear it and rejoice. O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together.”
Psalm 34:1-3
Before you ask for anything, focus on God’s character and nature. Spend time in worship and praise of Who He is. Set your heart and mind in the right posture to begin an authentic, effective conversation with the Almighty. He already knows what you will ask and what weighs heavily on your heart. Don’t rush into the requests. Take time to rest in Who He is. Don’t simply be a consumer.
“Ascribe to the LORD, O families of nations, ascribe to the LORD glory and strength. Ascribe to the LORD the glory due His name; bring an offering and come into His courts.”
Psalm 96:7-8
Recall His works and wonders.
“Come and hear, all who fear God, and I will tell of what He has done for my soul.”
Psalm 66:16
Thank Him for the Red Sea rescue, for the widow’s oil that didn’t run out, for being the God who stood and triumphed against the hundred prophets of Baal, the God who healed leprosy, crippled legs, blind eyes and deaf ears, the God who defeated death and paid for sin with His own life. Record those miracles and wonders from scripture so you have a go-to list to remind yourself of His power and provision. List the amazing things God’s done for you and shown you and thank Him for them. Remind yourself of His greatness and provision. It sets the tone for your upcoming requests and reminds you that nothing is too hard for Him. He sees. He hears. He acts. Believe Him.
“LORD, I have heard of your fame; I stand in awe of your deeds, LORD. Repeat them in our day, in our time make them known; in wrath remember mercy.”
Habakkuk 3:2
Surrender yourself to Him, ensure your heart is right.
Confess any lingering sin or offense. Scripture tells us again and again that our heart condition is important to God.
“If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened;”
Psalm 66:18
If we want effective communion with the Lord, we need to ensure there is nothing that stands between us and Him.
“The LORD is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.”
Proverbs 15:29
Humble yourself before the Lord. Allow Him to reveal what needs to be confessed. Let Him show you if there are idols that need to be displaced. Ask Him to soften your heart and make it right with Him.
“For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”
1 Peter 3:12
Pray
Pour out your heart to the One Who created you.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
Philippians 4:6
Throughout Scripture there are many different descriptions of prayer from crying out to quietly meditating. Prayer can be shouting in grief or joy, and interceding for ourselves and others. There is no ‘right’ volume or words. When we pray, we step past the veil into a spiritual realm that we cannot see but our spirits understand and where Jesus is our High Priest. He advocates for us in ways that no other will. He loves us. He protects us. He provides. Take time to dwell in that space and enjoy His presence.
Wait in hope
God always answers. Always. But His timing does not match our own. He exists outside of time and space and He holds all of history that has been and is yet to come in His scope as He works. Everything He does is interwoven with Who He is and with His plan for mankind. Trust His work.
“I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.”
Psalm 130:5
When we had children, it wasn’t simply to ‘get a child’ but to grow that relationship, watch how they learned, explored, and deepened their understanding of themselves, their family, and the world. The answer to our prayer for a child wasn’t just in the delivery (whether by birth or adoption) but in the unfolding of the whole experience of parenthood.
Prayer is similar. We should not just be there for the answer, but for the unfolding of the process and how it grows us. Waiting in hope deepens our faith. It shows us the depths of God’s love, care, and faithfulness- His ‘hesed’ (Hebrew). Hesed is God’s covenant faithfulness, His powerful merciful kindness that has our best at the heart of His work and His ways. Everything God does is ultimately pointed toward His will and plan to bring everything under His authority and rule, to bring Shalom- to set everything at one again, a step back to the garden before the fall. As you wait, remind yourself of the words “shalom” and “hesed”. There is purpose in the waiting. Don’t let your impatience and your longing overshadow His work.
Journal
How often do we hear or experience something and say “That’s something I’ll never forget!”, and yet, we do forget. Those powerful examples that God gives us often become dim or clouded when we’re desperate, struggling, longing for an answer. Journaling is a testament not only to ourselves, but to those who follow. It is a legacy of faith that attests to what God has done and how we learned to follow after Him. Because, if we’re honest, though we pray for answers to our prayers, our deepest longing is more of Him. When we stand in eternity, we won’t cling to that car, that job, that friend or family member, we will cling to Jesus and praise Him.
“We have heard with our ears, O God; our fathers have told us what You did in their days, in days long ago. It was not with their sword that they won the land, nor did their arm bring them victory; it was Your right hand, Your arm, for you loved them.”
Psalm 44:2-3
We want to ensure we leave a Godly heritage for our children and pass along generational blessings. What a treasure to have a record of what God did in a life!
“But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD’s love is with those who fear Him, and His righteousness with their children’s children—with those who keep His covenant and remember to obey His precepts.”
Psalm 103:17-18
Prayer is a beautiful, powerful communion with God that can take you deeper into fellowship with Him and strengthen your faith. There is no ‘perfect’ way to pray. God just wants to talk with you. Step into that conversation and listen for His voice.
I’ve created a printable you can use for this format of prayer. There are two versions, fancy or plain. Feel free to print them and share them. My prayer is that it will help you grow in your prayer life and deepen and enrich your time with the Lord.
Pray without ceasing, friends!
